Ritual Confessions

January 7, 2008

What fools the body more than warmth? — Stephen Dunn

Filed under: Uncategorized — elissakaren @ 3:59 am

Last night, lying in bed, I could not for the life of me get warm. My husband was working in the basement and not available to lend his body heat. I lay there burrowing into the blankets, trying to create a tight cocoon around myself, scrabbling vainly with my feet, shivering, miserable. After a while, an image came to me — an image of a truly wonderful product from Origins called the Ginger Comfort Body Wrap: a sage-green, flannel-covered, ginger-scented, rectangular wrap with the density and texture of a bean bag and about two feet in length. If you put it in the microwave for 3 minutes or so, it becomes a kind of heating pad. I’d bought it years ago, pretty much forgotten about it, then unearthed it recently to apply to an injury. So as it occurred to me, I began to weigh the pain of getting up, going downstairs in my little t-shirt and underwear and bare legs and feet and being even colder while standing on the kitchen floorboards and waiting for it to bake for 3 minutes. It was a daunting prospect, as I was already ensconced in bed and inertia had set in. Ten minutes later, still struggling with the decision, I thought, “Good Lord, if I’m going to obsess over it endlessly I may as well do it.” So I bit the bullet and 5 minutes later I was back in bed, luxuriating as wave after wave of radiant gingery heat kept undulating into the cave beneath the bedcovers. As I was dropping into drunkenly happy sleep a scant few moments later, I had this fleeting and slightly rueful thought: I am becoming an old lady, with old lady pleasures

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7 Comments »

  1. Remind me to bring you some chamomile tea and a square of red flannel when next I see you, to firmly usher you into your premature octogenarianism.

    Comment by davidrochester — January 7, 2008 @ 4:49 am

  2. P.S. If I weren’t such a gentleman, I might respectfully suggest that more cozy night attire might go a long way toward relieving your nocturnal chills. Then again, if a microwaved heating thing makes you feel old, you’d probably feel downright dead if you wore woolly socks and thermal jammies to bed.

    But since I am, in fact, a perfect gentleman, I won’t suggest any of that.

    Comment by davidrochester — January 7, 2008 @ 4:51 am

  3. David, you’re a most gallant gentleman, indeed.

    Comment by elissakaren — January 7, 2008 @ 7:33 am

  4. David, what she has is the classy version of the rice sock, lol…probably buckwheat and rice besides the lovely smelly stuff, that seems to be popular lately. Much safer than your heating pad, you little old man, you….

    Comment by thelittlefluffycat — January 7, 2008 @ 4:50 pm

  5. Little Fluffy Cat: !!!!!!!!!!!!!

    I am now most indignant. My huff is arriving, and I am departing in it. Little old man, indeed! Wanting a warm thing in bed is most exquisitely mid-Victorian. I am certainly a living anachronism, but never shall I confess to little old manliness.

    Plus, the heating pad lasts all night, so NEENER.

    Comment by davidrochester — January 7, 2008 @ 9:47 pm

  6. Right till it sets your bed on fire with you in it, yes. Neener squared.

    Comment by thelittlefluffycat — January 7, 2008 @ 11:02 pm

  7. *sulking*

    Comment by davidrochester — January 8, 2008 @ 6:18 am


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